It’s All One Song

The image above is a screenshot of a slide from the teaching of the venerable Kevin Callaghan. Kevin is one of the teachers in the online seminary program I’m participating in with my wife Katie.

This image struck me during class a few weeks ago.

A boy crawling through a tunnel. It is dark. It is east of Eden. There is a light ahead, but it hard to make out. There is love up ahead, but it is hard to know what love is. We need to keep moving forward.

That previous short paragraph captures something about this moment.

***

I’m about 150,000 words into a draft my next book. The book keeps changing. I don’t know what I’m writing yet. It’s about my father. It’s about anxiety. It’s about dying and living.

Sometimes I think the book is a rewrite of The Chronicles of Narnia. And sometimes it seems to be a rewrite of Little Boy Lost by William Blake. The book might be a riff off the character Elijah in the Bible. It might be a cover of Seven Swans by Sufjan Stevens. Or Supper’s Ready by Genesis.

Sometimes I think the book is a sequel to the best-selling novel The Person on the Other Side of This Book. Of course by best-selling, I mean worst-selling.

I don’t know what the book is yet, but I am happy with what is happening. The something that is happening is probably more than one book. I’m happy to let that something keep happening. I’m getting closer to my worlds now. Getting closer to my words. This book will be unlike my other books, even though it is a riff off my other books. All of my writing is one song. The venerable Neil Young howls this during a concert. It’s all one song.

It’s all one song, and I’m grateful to keep singing.

***

I’ve recorded a few songs on my computer over the last year. A rewrite of Rockin’ in the Free World. A cover of Eyes by Rogue Wave. A cover of Rise by Eddie Vedder with my son Solomon’s ukulele. For my next number, I want to record a version of Seven Swans by Sufjan Stevens. It’s one of my favorite songs. I think I’ll sing and play ukulele. I’m going to ask Solomon to play viola and maybe piano.

In the words of the venerable Jeff Tweedy, feel free to make a record with your friends, sing a song that never ends.

It is better to make music than not to make music. Better to write than not to write. Better to keep moving forward, no matter how dark it gets. If you just stay true, some good things are coming back to you.

It’s all one song, and I’ll keep singing.