A Visit

My friends Ben and Gail visited a few weeks ago. They both came to give talks at The University of Iowa.

Ben’s dissertation research is about using improv to discuss climate change. He led a workshop, was a guest facilitator in my classes, and hung out with me for the week. Gail is a literacy researcher. She gave a talk about sound, psychoanalytic therapy, and teaching and learning.

Ben and Gail are both brilliant. They have also become, over the years, really good friends. It was very nice to spend some time them.

***

Ben stayed in my basement and tagged along with me at work. I proudly introduced him to anyone and everyone.

“Ben is my former high school student,” I’d say.

I’ve known Ben for about seventeen years. That is a long time. I watched him grow up into whatever he is now. That last sentence is really funny to me.

Ben and I were involved in all sorts of theatrical projects over the years. We’ve improvised together. Our most recent project is a satirical novel about academia. It’s written as emails. The book is absurd but, to my view, very funny. I’m trying to figure out how to put the book out right now. Satirical novels can be difficult to sell. At least that’s what the handful of literary agents I’ve contacted have told me. Ben and I tend to blow past the line in satire, so ours might be especially hard to sell.

My friend Nate in State College has an improv show called Bono Saves the World. Nate portrays Bono and invites celebrities on to talk about mundane problems. I loved being a guest when I was still in State College. I portrayed Mitch McConnell, Nancy Reagan, and Bruce Springsteen. Lots of fun. Nate asked if I wanted to record a video and send something in for his show this spring. I figured it would be fun to involve Ben. Ben portrayed King Charles and I was Queen Camilla. We recorded about 30 minutes of unhinged, raunchy, and abusive conversation between their majesties. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard.

Gail was the first person I met in State College. She was friends with my advisor. Over the years, Gail has become just about one of my favorite people in the world. She arrived for her talk on Friday. It was so good just to hang out with her. She was a professor at Iowa before going to Penn State. So this was something of a triumphant return for her.

I don’t know. Nothing much to say. It was nice to have Gail and Ben here.

***

Here’s the punchline to my cute little story about Gail and Ben’s visit. After dropping Ben at the airport, I took Gail back to where she was staying. The driveway was a little narrow, and I was probably exhausted from all the social activity. I’m an introvert for heaven’s sake! Regardless, I wasn’t paying attention as I backed out of the driveway and I hit a tree. I heard a crunching sound, but figured it was just the bumper. I started driving away, planning to assess the damage when I got home. I only lived a mile or two down the road. Then I looked in the rearview mirror and realized my back windshield had shattered.

I was more annoyed than angry. What moron backs into a tree and destroys their back windshield? This moron, I guess.

I tried to call Allstate. It was Saturday and I couldn’t, for the life of me, contact a human voice. My plan is to call my agent on Monday and figure out what to do with my decimated car.

A catastrophic end to a delightful visit, I guess.